There’s little point trying to follow what’s going on and instead you’re better off just enjoying the ride.
The plot goes from nuts to crazy at a rate of knots, the plot not so much playing out as smearing itself across the screen like a big spray of red and purple vomit. Your created character is the Boss, head of the gang, supported throughout by a handful of NPC allies such as smooth-talker Pierce and foul-mouthed femme fatale Shaundi. You can guess which choice the Saints make. He wants 60% of their takings or it’s all-out war. During the robbery, the Saints are cornered by Phillipe Lauren, the man who runs the Syndicate, a rival crime family muscling in on the Saints’ territory. If that was as nuts as it gets, I’d still consider that pretty strange, but it’s not. Their popularity is so out of control that as the game opens they’re staging a fake bank robbery just to entertain, signing autographs for workers and fielding shouted questions from the SWAT team as they go. So we have Saints Row: The Third, the story of the fall and rise of the 3rd Street Saints, a former gang whose achievements turned them into a violent, overblown PR cash-cow and even allowed them to slap a corporate logo on their particular brand of mayhem and destruction. Nintendo seem happy to port an apparently random smorgasbord of last-gen titles to their little wonder-toy and that’s up to them. I could harp on about how porting it to the Switch makes about as much sense as putting paprika chicken in a strawberry blancmange, but at this point with games like Sniper Elite V2 and Blades of Time making their way to Nintendo’s handheld, it would appear we are no longer living in the time of sense and reason. It’s the sort of game you’d struggle to release these days something almost deliberately offensive and knowingly crass – but by the old gods and the new, it’s definitely fun. On its initial release in 2011, it got its props from being brash and unreserved and unashamed. Originally released on PS3, Xbox 360, and PC platforms and scored 8/10 on Xbox 360
These reviews aren’t just to talk about the game but to look at how the games run and play on the Switch and how they use the Switch features. If you’re new to the Switch Re:Port Reviews on the Geek, I (with the help of the fine folk here) look at the Switch ports of games that have been released on other platforms. Today’s Switch Re:Port Review looks at a last generation AAA game ported to Switch, the new Sonic racing game, a timeless classic finally going portable, and a point and click adventure that has more humour than touchscreen support.
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